It feels good to be back, at least in one's own heart. Time is flying now. I am not sad anymore, nor afraid, or so do I feel until I feel it. I wouldn't have yearned for so much clarity, this straightforwardness of everything, the solidity of reality--not doubting yet a second of the nature of its essence. There still are these issues bigger than me, the little girl, which I wouldn't even dare having a glimpse at. For these, a bird's eye view, insight, or mere presence would be greatly appreciated. But what have you done? It feels like I lost my connection, and to my absence of overwhelming panic while considering it, a safe trust in the all-potentiality relates more than the earlier loss of sensibility.  It heals me every time; past tricks make me smile again. Still missing, now like an old, past, sweetest dream. Things unravelled I yearn to weave again.